It has been a month since India received quite a reawakening. When women banded together and called out incidents of sexual misconduct by celebrities, the who's who of film, media, politics, and other sectors. A storm of accusations that made all of us mull over several experiences of the past, incidents that still make us retch but we didn't have the gall to talk about. Why? Because we were scared. Because there was too much at stake if you summoned up the courage to accuse someone of having molested you. Not anymore. I hope so at least.
The #MeToo movement, kick-started and spearheaded by the civil rights activist Tarana Burke, was to be the final nail in the coffin of all the sexually exploitative activities of those who abused their privilege to harass helpless victims. But no, it would be far-fetched to believe that this was the end of it; the story is far from being over.
With the explosion of the #MeToo movement, we came to realise that we weren't alone. There were several shoulders to cry on, numerous helping hands always within arm's length and many listening ears. At the same time, it's horrifying to know how several millions around you have had to undergo so many nauseating and absolutely disgusting episodes at some point in their lives.
These varied experiences had different power equations but the scales were tipped in favour of the harasser more often than not. Most of them could use their money and clout to get away with what they did. And the victim? In almost all cases, they would have no recourse. It would be a challenge to even talk about their trauma to anyone. You could be rich or popular and still there wouldn't be a lot of people who would be willing to fight your battle with you. So before you even wonder why someone took years or decades to come out with their story, study the reactions of people to sexual assault accounts. It isn't exactly a pretty sight. Such traumatic experiences can take a toll on one's emotional health and that, coupled with the way society digests or rather chokes on such stories, force victims to walk a tightrope when it comes to opening up.
Over the years, the topic of consent has also been systematically dissected. What essentially constituted consent? It was painfully laughable that you reached the point of having to give lessons about the bare minimum that had to be done to ‘prevent’ being labelled a harasser. As has been consistently stressed, consent is not the absence of a 'no', but the presence of a 'yes'. All you have to do is back off when you sense the slightest sense of discomfort in someone. All you have to do is respect someone's boundaries.
As #MeToo surfaced, relationships were redefined, family boundaries were checked, there was pandemonium in fandoms and a collective sense of disbelief, horror and then regret at how myopic we were to our own downfall. This was our calling. This was where we had to stand up for ourselves and name and shame the perpetrators. Their time was up.
And now, the fire continues to rage and billow. And it should. It should keep burning until every single perpetrator is condemned, held guilty and accountable. Until they think twice about putting anyone through what they had hitherto subjected others to without so much as a blink. For that, we need to speak up. We need to extend support to the victims. We need to be angry. Angry enough to topple the structures that protect the harassers.
Your silence is tantamount to your complicity in enforcing the power dynamic. It is your seal of approval for the continued pattern of coercion that is forced down on the victims, nearly all of whom are women. It is your ignorance of the injustice that has subjected millions of victims to a lifetime in the throes of shame and muted agony. And this silence is deafening.
Wake up.